SUPERMAN SECRETLY BILL CLINTON?

It was a surprising morning for the Clinton family. Finding out one of your family members was a superhero would be traumatizing to any family. "The facts just completely add up, sort of, kind of, not really, not at all, hey look, a 20 dollar bill!" Says CCN host Rob Jenkins. "I always thought he was Batman," added Hillary Clinton, wife of Bill. Someone who we think was SuperBill was spotted flying across the sky to the White House, muttering something about 'Don't ask, don't tell'. We don't have any further information on the topic, except for the even further proof that Bill Clinton was found with a Batman suit in his closet. "I'm telling you, I'm quite sure he's Batman!" Hillary Clinton adds. More news on this soon.